RexMag's Naughty Files Adult Discussion Board Rex is in the House

Board Photos Radio and TV Match Maker Reputations Points
Go Back   RexMag's Naughty Files Adult Discussion Board > Adult Humor > Jokes & Humor
Register Arcade Blogs FAQTop Posters Calendar Mark Forums Read


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1 (permalink)  
Old 01-17-2009, 11:31 AM
manictaz's Avatar
Valuable Member
Points: 312,242, Level: 100 Points: 312,242, Level: 100 Points: 312,242, Level: 100
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: west mids, uk
Posts: 69,830
My Mood: Tired
Thanks: 59
Thanked 78 Times in 34 Posts
manictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond reputemanictaz has a reputation beyond repute
first date

A young innocent girl is about to go on her first date and is given some word of advise and warning by her mother: "Look darling, they all want the same, so do be very careful and don't you ever let him;

1.) kiss your lips. Your lips are as soft as rose petals and will shrivel,

2.) or touch your breast. They are like of thin crystal and can shatter, and

3.) never ever to touch your "private" part. That one is like a "GRILL" and will burn everything coming to touch it."

The girl is off full of excitement and anxiety, and Mom waits and waits until just after midnight when she's back. "How was it?" asks mom.

"Oh mom, it was absolutely fantastic, and I think I'm in love!"

"Lets not go too fast dear. And did he tried to come too close?"

"Well, yes, he did and I did as you said and he was absolutely careful not to hurt or harm me!"

"What do you mean careful, did you let him do something?"

"Not exactly mom, see it was like that.

First he wanted to kiss me and I told him what you said, and he stopped.

Then he went to touch my breast and again I told him what you said, and he stopped.

Then he slowly went under my skirt close to the private part, and I told him what you said, and he then took his hands out and said; "What a coincidence, I happen to have a nice piece of "fillet" and would love to put it in your "grill" to cook!!""

"WHAT?!?" screams the mother, "I knew that bastard is no different to the others. You hopefully stopped him there too, didn't you?"

"Well, not really mom. You see, he promised to be careful and was very careful not to "burn" his fillet. Every now and then he took it out and had me "taste it" to see if it was cooked or not."
__________________








Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Top 5 Worst First Date Foods coot Dating 5 01-24-2009 11:56 AM
Dating women zimbago Jokes & Humor 0 09-25-2008 01:15 AM
Some old jokes 14inches Jokes & Humor 1 05-17-2008 02:04 PM
A Guy's Guide To "First Dates" manictaz Jokes & Humor 0 04-25-2006 08:52 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:05 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.6
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
© 2002 - 2010 BN Media, LLC