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Old 12-21-2008, 03:08 PM
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Thumbs up Confucius Say...

Confucius Say...

* Grease monkey who go to bed without bathing wake up oily in the morning.

* Man who run in front of car get tired.

* Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

* Baseball is wrong - man with four balls cannot walk.

* War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left.

* Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.

* Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

* It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.

* Man who drive like hell bound to get there.

* Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.

* Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.

* Don't eat the snow where the huskies go!

* Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!

* Man who lose key to apartment not get new key.

* He who sitteth on an upturned tack shall surely rise.

* Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.

* Man who sit on tack get point!

* Man who jumps off cliff, jumps to conclusion!

# Man that is stuck in pantry has his ass in jam.

# Man standing on toilet is high on pot.

# Secretary not permanent fixture until screwed on top of desk

# Man who stick foot in mouth get athlete's tongue!

# Man who live in glass house should not throw parties!

# Man that go to bed with itchy butt wake up with sticky fingers!

# When called an idiot sometimes is better to be quiet, than open mouth and remove all doubt.

# "Man with glass house must dress in basement!"

# Everyone has a photographic memory, some people just don't have film!

# Passionate kiss like spider's web, soon lead to undoing of fly.

# Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone.

# Man who behaves like an ass will be the butt of those who crack jokes.

# Marriage is like game of poker. You start with pair and end with full house.

# Man who run behind car get exhausted.

# Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.

# Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

# Man with one chopstick go hungry.

# He who thinks only of number one must remember this number is next to nothing

# Man who farts in church sits in his own pew!

# Hole happy, whole body happy.

# He who stands on toilet, is high on pot.

# He who makes love in grass, gets piece on earth.

# Wash your face in the morning, neck at night.

# He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.

# Elevator smell different to midget.

# Work to become, not to acquire.

# A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose.

# Man who put head on Railroad track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.

# Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes will soon burn out!

# Don't drink and park, accidents cause people.

# War does not determine who's right, war determines who's left.

# Those who quote me are fools.

# Confucius say too damn much.
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